"Rogues Gallery of Terror"

Films: Thir13en Ghosts (2001)

Alias: Billy Michaels the First Born Son, Jimmy "The Gambler" Gambino the Torso, Susan LeGrow the Bound Woman, Jean Kriticos the Withered Lover, Royce Clayton the Torn Prince, Dana Newman the Angry Princess, Isabella Smith the Pilgrimess, Harold Shelburne the Great Child, Margaret Shelburne the Dire Mother, George Markley the Hammer, Ryan Kuhn the Jackal, and Horace "Breaker" Mahoney the Juggernaut

Type: Mystical

Location: Haunted home

Height/Weight: That of average humans.

Affiliation: Neutral, leaning on Evil

Summary: Way back at the beginning of the 60s, we saw what happens when you stuff your house full of spirits of varying temperaments. Now, it happens again, only this time, there's no holding back...

History: Cyrus Kriticos was an overly wealthy occultist with an agenda. In order to gain absolute power, he took some blueprints from the 15th century, and crafted the Ocularis Infernum, a machine capable of harnessing the power of ghosts by taking their essence. But it only truly works if there are 13 of them within Cyrus' possession, so he found 12. Each and every ghost has its own intricate backstory and motive, yet they are powerless under Cyrus' machine's thrall. Now, Cyrus has invited his family over so that one of them may become the final ghost...

Notable Kills: See Final Fate.

Final Fate: After one guest causes the machine to malfunction, the ghosts are freed from Cyrus’ control, and in shared fury, they toss him into it, shredding him to pieces. With the Ocularis Infernum destroyed, the spirits are free to move on to the afterlife.

Powers/Abilities: Complete invincibility and invisiblity.

Weakness: With special glasses, people can see the ghosts perfectly. Also, they cannot do anything against he who controls the Ocularis Infernum.

Scariness Factor: 4-For a bunch of spirits who don't do much for the little screen time they receive, these ghosts look positively...well, dead. The particular standouts ironically get the spotlight the most, them being the insane Jackal and the nail-encrusted Juggernaut. For what it's worth though, they choose to move on together after they're free, so really the monster here was Cyrus.

Trivia: -The DVD came with a full video detailing the ghosts' backstories, such as the Jackal having been an asylum patient who let himself burn in a fire after treatment only made his condition worse. Many consider this thing in the Special Features to be better than the movie itself.

-Originally, this film was going to include a few more subplots and take place over several days, but that felt like it would be too convoluted.


Image Gallery


Seems Cyrus has been practicing the multiplication table.

"They still make lawn darts? God..."

Uh...that can't feel good, even after death. But that sounds redundant.

The sad fate of Raymond Holt.

Still more dignity than Honey Boo-Boo's mother.
What happens when humans and hyenas cross-breed.

So...think you could give love another shot?

Disturbing, but that eye shadow? Really?

The Adams Family has nothing on this.
TF2's Scout did his best to stay away from him.

Overall, you got off light. I think.

"More water. Seriously. I'm more of a corpse than the others corpses."

AHHH! A REPUBLICAN POLITICIAN!


Trailer(s)